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Guest Post – Pre-Wedding Thoughts by Miss M

2 Aug

The first of a new series of posts that read like the uncensored pages of “A Bride’s Diary”

This guest post is written by Miss M (let’s just call her that). I know her through a common friend, and I keep hearing bits and pieces about her wedding prep through that friend. Imagine my surprise when I read the post she sent in – although we are in touch through a friend, we’re going through the exact same things! I can totally relate to almost every single line of her post. Oddly, it feels like she has taken the words from my mouth and put them down on paper. I don’t want to spoil the fun for you, so go ahead and read it yourself. This post is about her sharing her feelings about getting married.

Image by © Kyle Monk/Blend Images/Corbis

When the “bride-to-be” (that would be me!) requested me to write this post I did not take it too seriously. I said, “Sure” – just as a gesture of courtesy. Then I read her blog and it was a fun and interesting read. It made me think about my life, my feelings and my journey as a bride-to-be. Less than hundred days left for the wedding and I have so many thoughts flooding my head.
Clothes, jewelry and other bridal things…! There is this fact about me which only a few people close to me know i.e. I do not like shopping! Yup, its true. Specially clothes. I do like strolling through malls, window shopping – but only once in a while, and and only when I need something.
But let me tell you, wedding shopping is a whole different ball game! Mother forcing you to buy tonnes of clothes – gawdy ones that are a riot of colors – to be worn as a newly wed. You enter a shop and you put your finger on any saree and it will be yours! I must admit that I do have a lot of fancy Indian clothes now – enough to last me a lifetime. Atleast that’s how I feel!
If I had it my way, I wouldn’t have a fancy wedding. It would just be a few close friends and family in a temple. And maybe a party after that! But as I have been told by many who have already trudged this path, particularly a very close friend who has told me, “Marriage is for you, wedding is for your family”. And now I know how that makes perfect sense. So, here I am, for the love of my folks, indulging in everything from the wedding trousseau to invitation card desings!
To be quite honest, thinking about the wedding day really freaks me out – I feel like Julia Roberts in The Runaway Bride ! I honestly do, except her issues were a little different from mine. For me, the issue is that on D-day I will be the center of attention. There will be hundreds of people staring at me – that’s an extremely uncomfortable thought! But then I think about how the love of my life will be standing next to me, withstanding all of that with me. I feel relief. And I find solace in that belief.
To love and to be loved by the same person for a long time is a blessing not everyone has. And I truly thank God for giving me that. And THIS is what it culminates into! This whole phase doesn’t feel real. Surreal. It’s like watching a movie featuring me where I am aware of what is happening, I feel the feelings..but the fact that it’s all ME hasn’t sunk in yet.

“I let it fall, my heart,

and as it fell, you rose to claim it” – Adele

Are you brideys also feeling the same things?

My thoughts – I would have also prefered a small wedding, followed by that party! But yes, eventually we all have to realise that the wedding is also about our parents and families being able to have all their wishes fulfilled. There’s really no point in fighting it, but to give in sooner than later! You will spare yourself and everyone around you a lot of fights. I also hate knowing that everyone will be looking at the bride! How uncomfortable! It’s terribly hard for some of us to embrace the attention. And yes, most fun about wedding shopping – ask, and it shall be yours! Loving feeling so spoilt! Miss M, I hope we get many more posts from you 🙂

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6 Responses to “Guest Post – Pre-Wedding Thoughts by Miss M”

  1. Bhumika M August 2, 2012 at 10:30 am #

    My fiancé is an atheist. Me agnostic. I’d always imagined that a quiet registered marriage is what we’d have (I am a lawyer, that piece of paper matters more to me than anything else). Through our 8years of being together, we’d had minimum interference from the families. Families loved us and we loved both sets. IMAGINE MY HORROR and confusion when fiancé and I decided it was time to tie the knot, he told me he wants a full fledged punjabi do because that is what his family has always wanted! My quiet, calm life just became a battle field with parents suddenly making decisions and my life not being my own anymore. On top of that, the inherently shy me having being told that I am to be the centre of attention, I really has te worst few months of my life! I too was continuously informed that the marriage is what we get while wedding is for the families. But thank god for my loving fiancé and family who truly took care of bridezilla me. Today, Everytime I get stresse and get angry considering there is so much to do, I stop, deep breath and think at the end of that road I get to spend my life with my best friend and my lover. Now, can I really complain about anything?

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  2. Aditi Pednekar August 2, 2012 at 4:27 pm #

    Such a meaningful line: “Marriage is for you, wedding is for your family”. To be honest I am not scared that everybody will be watching me (I would love that attention) but my guy is terrified thinking how my distant relatives will scan him & talk about him!! 😛

    I also feel this —> It’s like watching a movie featuring me where I am aware of what is happening, I feel the feelings..but the fact that it’s all ME hasn’t sunk in yet.

    Nice to know you M!!

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  3. Swati Murti August 2, 2012 at 4:39 pm #

    well, congrats M for being so loved… yes, wedding is for families!!! even I would hate being the center of attention!!

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    • Swati Murti August 2, 2012 at 4:40 pm #

      I guess the tone of my comment is probably looking sarcastic but in fact, I meant the very opposite!!! so, don’t take umbrage. its a very different feeling to be loved by the same person and destined to be with each other forever!!!

      Like

  4. Miss M August 3, 2012 at 12:12 pm #

    Thank you all for the responses. and thanks to the thedelhibride for blogging my post !

    – Miss M 😉

    Like

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. A Bride’s Diary – “Ours was a love marriage” « thedelhibride Indian Weddings blog - September 7, 2012

    […] straight out of a bride’s diary. Miss M kick started the series with her straight-from-the-heart post on pre-wedding thoughts. My cousin sister, Ankita, our guest blogger for today – follows […]

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