thedelhibride Asks…Dating for Newlyweds

Congratulations! You’re hitched! You’re back from your honeymoon, and start living the daily dream of spending as much time as you want with your husband. Or, do you?

Shinjini_18557

I just read here that this newlywed husband and wife go out every Sunday on a date. And no, not the boring movie + dinner kind (although I would give an arm and a leg for enough of these), but the “random” kind. Aptly named “Random Sunday”, this couple heads out every Sunday not knowing where the drive will take them. They’ve managed to watch a play, visit the planetarium, drop by an old cars exhibition, and many more such random things.

Well, although I’m trying really hard to stay out of “crib mode” these days, I must confess.ย Since we’ve been married, my husband and I have been on a grand total of TWO dates – one of which was on my birthday (yes, it required an event of such a scale to get him out for date night).

So, what do we do on Sundays? We spend time with our friends, or there’s always some lunch/dinner obligation we must attend to. Our social engagements never seem to end! Not that I don’t want to do these things as well (I’m just as guilty of saying “yes” to any and every group plan), but I feel like taking out the time to go on a date is essential. Especially when you’re living with your family. And since my husband works 6 days a week, Sunday is a good day (and probably the only day) to plan a relaxed date.

In one line – I want to go out on dates again. Dear husband, are you listening?ย I want it to be a constant part of our lives, not something we do once in a blue moon.ย We used to go out on 2-3 dates every week before the wedding! What happened?

Newlyweds – do you still go on dates with your husband? How often? Do you think it’s important?

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20 Comments

    1. Yeah, I keep looking for ways to get “us” time in during the week, but it’s just not easy! Dedicated day for a date seems like the best way to go.

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  1. My husband has a niece and a nephew, and, the moment they see us stepping out of the house they’re like, ‘Hum bhi chalenge!!!!’… IMAGINE THAT! In these 6 months that we’ve been married, we’ve gone on a date like, ummm.. maybe thrice. :-/

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  2. My Husband used to come to meet me during Weekends but now as now I am ghar ki Daal, we hardly went somewhere for a date ๐Ÿ˜ฆ
    During weekend we go for marketing (grocery & vegetables)
    P.S: It’s not even 3 months of our marriage

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    1. I see it’s not uncommon for newlyweds to get so lost in real life that they forget to re-connect and go out on fun dates! Must do something about it *hurries off to make a plan*

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  3. Going on dates is really important .. otherwise everything just gets really boring .. and you get lost in your routine life.. I am the planner in my home .. that’s why I try to plan some weekend getaway or some activity for weekends .. but it will be nice to see my husband taking the reins .. and surprising me ๐Ÿ˜€

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  4. Since me and my husband live alone, it seems like we are on an endless date. But what tends to happen most of the time is he + his laptop and me+ my laptop and then us just sitting together for meals. So we make it a point that every weekend we do atleast one regular thing- like one movie compulsary and one fancy thing. I think thats why its necessary to take holidays and breaks and short trips …it keeps the spark alive!

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    1. Yeah can u imagine? we live with in-laws and yet we manage to just be on our laptops all the time! but I need to convince him now that we NEED to chalk out some date time on Sundays. It’s the only day we’re totally relaxed and we need to make use of it!

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  5. for the 5 years we were dating Saturday night was fixed as date night…even if we both finished work at 10pm…and it was non negotiable as our work schedules are insane.

    Since the past 5 months..we’ve tried keeping it the same or at the most sunday (though I try keeping sundays for family). if nothing we’ll order in something yum, open a bottle of wine and watch back to back episodes of Homeland or Suits..The important thing atleast for us is to have privacy (which my in laws happily give us) and to basically be together.

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    1. Me too!!! I wish law firms here were that cool and dramatic! All I do is normal people lawyering! ๐Ÿ˜›

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    2. Trust me- I was ready to chuck my pharmacy degree through the window and go back to school to be a lawywr after watching this show :p
      But I’ve asked lawyer friends about it, and they say that law practice in north america is definitely not as cool as what they show on tv- though they wish it was. And i think the world would be a better place with a few more harvey specters in it!

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  6. My boyfriend and I have been in a long distance relationship since the beginning of our relationship, with him being in Singapore for the last couple of years.. People keep telling me that I should now marry since both of us are “settled” in our respective careers. My only objection to that is – how can I marry when I haven’t ever properly dated?!! What you’ve written is exactly what I fear – we’ll end up like a married couple and I’ll end up never having properly being treated as a girlfriend before becoming a “wife”! this post sort of confirm my fears…

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    1. Vasundhara.. at the risk of sounding like one half of a “married couple” I must tell you..being married is really fun, specially if you’ve married your best friend. But yes, you’re fears aren’t unwarranted..maybe you could take a trip there (all the externals permitting) or he could come down and meet you..

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    2. Hi Vasundhara, Me and my hubby had a long distance as welll..Right from the begining…In a lot of ways it made me feel like..if i can survive that, i could survive anything. On the flip side though, living together was a big adjustment-but that would have been the case even if we werent long distance.

      After about a year of married life full of fun, laughter, tears, fights and countless date nights i can definitely say its a whole different exciting experience !!! ๐Ÿ™‚ . It requires you and your hiusband to step up and take responsibility for the fact that you actually need to put in some effort into the r/s if you want to survive and be happy. But once that effort is put in..its well worth it!

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  7. My husband and I love alone, so we haven’t scheduled any “date night”. However, we are both romantics at heart, so every day can feel like a date night. My favourite memory so far: When we were back from India, and severely jetlagged, we’d wake up at 3 AM. Once I got so fed up with this internal alarm clock, that hubby decided to put it to good use and we were dancing all around the house at that early hour… and such random stuff still continues. Always shakes me out of the routine, and just highlights the incredible fact that we’re married!! ๐Ÿ˜€

    So my point being… I don’t think it’s the “date night” that’s needed…. anything to shake up routines is a good thing – and anything to show your love to each other ๐Ÿ™‚

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  8. Ours is date night every time I don’t feel like cooking (or my experiment with food goes wrong!) :D… I think that’s one of the very few plus points of not living with your in laws..

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